Porcelain Princess
by AnimeGirl2258
Summary: Back then London needed an heir, one which the Monarchs could not naturally provide, an unofficial heir would do. The unofficial Princess was a hand full which Earl Grey would learn all too soon. Two mischievous people were they, both the butler and the royal, what tomfoolery they could avoid would be a godsend, if they could avoid any at all.
1. Chapter 1

Porcelain Princess

(Prologue)

I was five years old when the Orphanage Director announced that the Queen would be coming to adopt a child. I remember how all the children and all the assistants rushed about madly as they worked to prepare for the sudden visit. The older girls of the house did their very best to look as nice as possible for the visit, and made sure to get us younger girls ready.

I recall sitting on my small creaky bunk while Charlotte, whom was nearly fifteen and easily the oldest girl in Orphanage, laced up my shoes for me since I had yet to learn to do so myself. Charlotte had given me a dress she wore at my age, hand-me-downs came about often for us younger children so it was nothing new and the dress was naturally nothing very special. Charlotte was the closest thing I had to family in the Home, she was what I imagined having an older sister to be like.

"Now listen to me," Charlotte said as she combed my hair, "when the Queen comes you smile, stay quiet, that means no tomfoolery, and you bat those great big cobalt blue eyes of yours that makes all the adults melt."

"No tomfoolery? But, Charlie, what's the fun to be had?" I questioned impishly.

"None, there is no fun to be had at this moment. This moment is when you leave Poorhouse and live richer than any of us could ever dream!" Charlotte exclaimed, she clearly had thought very deeply about the subject.

"But, Charlie, if it's so important to you why don't you go and live with the Queen?" I inquired innocently, Charlotte chuckled lowly.

"I'm far too old to be adopted, Silly. Too old and too full of bad habits, but you, you can still be trained to act like a civilized lady just like Her Majesty." I didn't know how to respond to such a thing so I merely changed the subject.

"I don't make adults melt with my eyes." My lips formed a pout.

"Oh don't be ridiculous, you'd get away with murder with those orbs! You've even made mean old Mrs. Jackson soften up with a single look!"

You see the Queen herself hadn't had any children due to her husband's sterility, obviously an heir to the throne was needed, and so the royal couple had set out to find an, albeit unofficial, heir to the throne of England.

The Monarchy had arrived, all the young children in the Orphanage were lined up, standing straight, feet together, shoulders back, chests out, it was such an uncomfortable way to stand but Mrs. Jackson had absolutely insisted.

I was the smallest of all the children, hardly reaching anyone's shoulder, and I was standing right in the middle of the line so I suppose it was only natural that the Queen's gaze didn't even fall on me due to my tininess.

I was disappointed, my eyes fell to the floor immediately I hadn't even been recognized and Charlotte had put so much work into me that day. Something shiny caught my eye and I looked ahead just in time to see a golden earring plummeting to the hardwood. I stepped out of line quickly as I hurried toward the jewel, I picked it up then raised my eyes, the Queen hadn't even noticed it had fallen. A small tug on her dress and the lovely royal turned to me, I extended my hand to her, holding the earring up as high as my little arm would allow.

"Mrs. YourMajesty, you dropped this." I stated, "it fell in front of Grabby Greta so I thought I'd give it to you before she snatched it." I glanced to the girl in question just in time for her to give me a sour look and make a fist at me. The Queen laughed as she took my hand into hers causing me to look back to her.

"Well thank you very much. What a darling little girl you are. What is your name, Dear?" My eyes roamed over the lovely jewels the Monarch adorned, and the charming dress I had so carelessly tugged on.

"I'm Freddy." I exclaimed with a grin.

"Oh and what might that be a nickname for?" The Queen seemed amused by my infancy.

"Frederique!" I answered happily, then I remembered something. "It's nice to meet you, Mrs. YourMajesty." I fluttered my lashes just as Charlotte had told me to, and I witnessed the Ruler of England melt.

I was taken away from the Orphanage immediately, the very moment I fluttered my eyes in fact. I wasn't given the chance to say goodbye to the children whom I'd grown up with, not even to Charlotte. But as I was loaded into the Royal carriage, which was idle just before the Poorhouse, I heard a rally of cries and voices. All the children had rushed outside and were chasing after the carriage, waving as big as they could and shouting their goodbye's. Charlotte, being the oldest child and therefore much faster than the rest, was at the head of the crowd.

The Queen and King were very affectionate to me instantly, Her Majesty insisted that I share their chamber she claimed it was because at my age she was afraid to sleep on her own. The Royals went out of their way to take me on weekly outings, they would parade me all around England and proudly at that. They made a point to dress me in the finest dresses, once I had commented on a doll I saw in a shop window, more specifically, I commented on its dress and the Monarch's ordered it be made for me. From then on the Queen made a habit of having the dresses she witnessed on porcelain dolls made for me, the citizens of England came to know me as the Porcelain Princess.

I was of course made to attend etiquette classes every day and such. I was often scolded for my tomfoolery toward the instructor; I would always play tricks on her then end up wearing that stupid 'Dunce' cap and sitting in the corner during break time. Nonetheless the instructor somehow managed to teach me how to properly act like a lady, at least in public anyway.

After nine years of lessons, I was still attending etiquette classes once a week, even though most girls my age had completed the course. It wasn't due to my being a 'poor student' I knew all there was to know about decorum, public and private, I just wasn't comfortable with all the restrictions being a lady came with and simply refused to show any sort of learning curb. Two more years of torture and I finally escaped the wretched class, though it was really my own fault for being so tenacious.

Mother and I went off on a trip not long after I finished my classes, a tour of Europe which would take about three years to complete. Mother of course couldn't stay for the entire trip, she was needed in England and so she left me, I was known to most countries then as the Porcelain Princess then, to be the face of Britain, to make deals, give speeches, go to balls, and have dinners with nobility in the name of England. It was the dullest three years of my life! Imagine being in a beautiful country and not being able to properly explore it, I snuck away a few times but for whatever reason trouble always seemed to find me when I did.

Two years into my tour of Europe Papa passed away, I was eighteen years old at the time I received the notice. I was devastated, naturally, we weren't flesh and blood but that didn't make him any less my Father. That day I gave a speech in honor of His Highness, my voice tremoring every now and then as I struggled to keep my emotions in check. It would take months for me to return home, there was no possible way that I could've made it in time for any sort of service; besides that, England needed a spokesperson at the time and the dealings with Europe were still at hand. I had no choice but to stay until the end of the expedition.

I was nineteen when I was finally able to see England again. Europe had been boring and I knew that home would be no different but I still found myself thrilled at the thought of being home again, most of all seeing Mother once more.

I had returned home a day earlier than expected, word had yet to reach Mother and so she would be quite surprised upon my premature arrival. As soon as the carriage stopped I threw open the door, not waiting for my footman to do so for me, and dashed up the palaces front stairwell. The two doormen stationed at the entrance hardly had time to open the towering doors before I rushed inside, my heels clicking on the marble inlay as I hurried into the throne room.

The splendid doors were opened for me at two servants saw my sprint, the throne room was just as ostentatious as I had remembered it to be but the familiar nostalgia of it never caused me pause in my rush.

"Mother!" I cried and the woman whom sat upon the throne rose immediately, as she descended the short stairs, which lead to her throne, she opened her arms wide for me.

"Freddy!" She sobbed as she wrapped her arms around me tightly and began to kiss me on my cheek and forehead. "You came back to me! And a day early no less!" She exclaimed with moistened eyes.

She had changed so much within the three years I was away, she had gained more wrinkles and age spots since we last saw one another; she wore all black as a widowed woman should but even with her changes she was still very much my Mother.

"You've grown so much," she placed a hand on my cheek, "you're nearly reach my chin now," I had always been an abnormally runty child. "You're even more beautiful than when I last saw you, and so thin. I'd venture to say that the only thing that hasn't changed about you, Dear, are those doll eyes you've got, I've missed seeing those vibrant cobalt globes of yours, peaking around corners to see what mischief to stir up." She touched my raven curls, "it was so short the last time, now its near your waistline and I see you're wearing the dress I sent you. I saw it on a porcelain doll in a shop window and just knew you would be divine in it!" She gestured to my crimson evening gown, which showed off my shoulders, sported lace and ruffles as well as black bow around my waist.

"I've missed you very much Mother," I said with a smile and dry eyes. "I'm so glad to be home again, just promise me something okay?"

"What is it, Dear?"

"Next time I go to another country, don't let Mr. Walsh be my supervisor that man hasn't even the slightest clue of how to relax. The entire trip I felt as though I was talking to a brick which was in great need of a massage!" Mother laughed loud and heartily at that.

"Dear, your wit has been missed as much as the rest of you!"

Mother and I talked for a while longer as she lead me to her throne where she took a seat, and I took the Kings chair as I always had before my journey and his departure. She listened to my travels favorably, which didn't include much outside of what I saw through the window of my room. Mother updated me on the political, as well as private, happenings of the England and the nobility within it. We were so busy catching up and laughing we hadn't noticed two men enter the throne room until they addressed Mother.

"Ah! Grey, Phipps, come here I would like to introduce you to my daughter!" She exclaimed with a wide grin, I rose from Papa's throne quickly, knowing that I wasn't supposed to sit there when others were present.

The two men climbed the short staircase giving me little time to inspect them, both were dyed white from head to toe, their shoes, trousers, shirts, tailcoats, even their hair was snowy and blank. I immediately began to wonder what they would look like if I were to dye them with actual color, something vibrant and fun, pink would be nice and silly on the two maybe add some dots to really goof them up. I giggled at the thought.

"What's so funny, Dear?" Mother questioned, knowing that my mind tended to wonder to odd places.

"I was thinking of how these two remind me of clean canvases and wondered how silly it would be to paint them pink with yellow dotting." Most would keep the thought to themselves but I honestly saw no reason to, my wondering was causing no harm to them not yet anyway. Mother chuckled at the idea.

"Thoughts are perfectly innocent, just leave them out of your clowning. Personally, I always imagined them in magenta with blue stripes." I giggled at the thought as she turned to the men. "No worries you two it's all in good fun!" She exclaimed.

I turned to the duo once more, expecting to see expressions of offence, however, I was instead met with smiles of genuine amusement on the young men's faces which I was somewhat disappointed by, if you can't get a rise out of someone by saying something like that then their either boring or strange, and I didn't like either.

"Of course You Highness." The said together. Mother stood and approached me, placing her hands on my arms.

"This is my daughter, the Porcelain Princess, Frederique." She looked to me, "Freddy, these two are acting as my both my butlers and guards this is, Earl Charles Grey." She gestured to the younger looking of the two, whom appeared to be around my age, "and Earl Charles Phipps." Hearing 'Charles' caused me to think of Charlotte suddenly, I had left the Orphanage at a very young age and didn't remember much of the place, but the one thing I did remember was her.

"Charlie…" I blurted, both the men looked to me in confusion as did my mother. "I-I was just reminded of a girl from the Poorhouse, Big Sis Charlie, that's all." I smiled at the thought and I noticed Mother smiling at it as well, probably because Charlie was all I could talk about when I first arrived at the palace.

"I'm glad to see all those years of etiquette didn't stop you from speaking your mind." Mother turned back to the men, "oh, Grey you'll have an entertaining time with her so long as you don't fall victim to her mischief!" I gave her a questioning look. "Freddy, Grey will be serving as your guard from here on out."

"Why? What happened to Nickolas?" I questioned as I wondered about the guard whom I had been introduced to when I first arrived at the fortress, and whom I had grown close to as well as begun to consider family.

"He… Was a traitor to the crown," she answered carefully, "he committed many serious crimes and… He was executed for his wrongdoings." A frown found my lips as my heart sank past my stomach and to my feet.

"...I'm not exactly sure how to respond to such a thing." I spoke in a not so careful tone, "the criminal you speak of wasn't the man whom protected me as a child, so I won't think of such a thing as to keep the memories of him playing hide and seek with me, and sneaking candy to my room untainted." Just like that I erased the information from my memory completely. Mother chuckled at my childlike exposition.

"That's a good mindset to have, keep it."

Mother had business to attend not long after Double Charles had entered the scene, she left reluctantly, Phipps close by her side, and took on the strong expression she was always known to wear, the face of a true Monarch.

It was just Grey and I left alone then, I exited the throne room and found that, even though my extravagant home had changed substantially in the last three years, I was becoming bored with the familiar yet new surroundings. Besides that, I was getting annoyed with Grey following me everywhere especially with his being so dreadfully silent, this thought caused me to spin on my heel so that I was facing him.

"You could at least strike up a conversation." I said with a pout, the man blinked thrice before responding.

"I wasn't aware that the Young Princess wished for conversation." A mischievous smile crept onto his face which made my blood hot, was that how people felt when I displayed the very same naughty smile?

"It's awkward otherwise wouldn't you agree? The silence I mean. Am I supposed to simply ignore your very presence until I'm in need of assistance? I wouldn't treat a dog in such a way, then again I am very much an animal lover." My words were quick as they often became when I came across a new someone, nerves and all that.

"Most normal Ladies would do with treating their guard as a shadow so- "

"You are not a shadow!" I exclaimed, rather loudly as I caused the man to jump, "and don't ever try to be one it's maddening!"

"As you wish, Porcelain Princess." He stated in an almost hesitant manner which didn't match the smirk which stayed on his lips. I wasn't very noble-like even after all my dreadful training.

"Freddy will do."

"With all due respect Milady, I couldn't possibly call- "

"It's an order. Call me Freddy, unless of course there's an official matter at hand then simply have Princess proceed it."

"Whatever you like, Freddy." His tone was formal, but I noted his eyes held the amusement of a child. I sighed as I turned away from him and continued on, it would clearly be very hard to get to him, all my fun would be ruined if he only laughed it off.

"I've never seen Her Majesty so jubilant as she was today." Apparently Grey had noted my want for conversation.

"What are you talking about? She's always like that, except when she goes to those stuffy ol' meetings or gives a speech." I wasn't too fond of the man thus far and so my tone wasn't very pleasant.

"I've worked under Her Highness for nearly three years now, and never have I seen her in a more pleasant disposition as when she was reunited with her daughter. She was quite miserable beforehand, and so for you returning Her Majesty's happiness, I am grateful." I stopped in my tracks.

"Alright, I know I'm the one who brought this on and I wasn't very specific." I turned to him, "but when I said I wanted conversation I didn't mean one which was tailored to my ego, or anything sentimental about Mother's love for me. I don't care for sappy conversations; they're foolish and make me vomit." Grey blinked once again in surprise, I supposed it was because most women would swoon at a man bringing up something so sweet and delicate, but I was not that kind of lady, I hated those types of discussions and I most certainly wouldn't swoon for them.

"Forgive me, I was unaware." This time that foolhardy smirk stayed vacant from his lips, which caused my own to reveal itself.

"And Grey, your subtle attempts at courting me in such a way are ineffective, mild men are of no use to the royal family and are quite unattractive contrary to what women want you to believe. Perhaps you should try again but more so as you actually would instead of misleading a woman into your arms with false emotional vulnerability." His smirk found him once more.

"It seems as though I've been caught in my performance. I suppose I should have no other choice but to redeem myself in the eyes of Young Princess Freddy."

"Should the Princess even be interested in your redemption." I stated, a strange gleam appeared in his eye. "Do keep it interesting otherwise I should become bored of you quickly." We must have appeared as two rascals playing a bizarre game as be both continued to leer at the other. We must've been cut from the same cloth, I wagered as I looked upon the very impish gleam my mother claimed to have witnessed a multitude of times in my own doll eyes. "Oh! That reminds me. I'll be going into the city today." I turned away once again.

"Eh? Shouldn't you enjoy staying in on your first day home, Freddy?" He questioned as he followed behind me.

"I said: 'I'll be going into the city today.' Does that not answer your completely unnecessary question, or shall I speak more simple-like from here on so that your stupid ears may comprehend?"

"No." He answered. Oh I had struck a nerve, I gave him an amused look over my shoulder, I could tell by his tone.

"Good, because I haven't the need to dumb myself down for a bloke. My wit's much too valuable." I gave him a wink he had to learn that my humor was quite cruel, which he must have understood due to his daring sneer. "Prepare for the outing," I told him as I entered into my room I whispered under my breath, "this is where I'll test this so called man's metal as a guard."


	2. Chapter 2

Jesting Guard, Royal Wit

Charles and I rode quietly along in the carriage, I watched out the window counting the number of people we crossed. I didn't much like the view, I had spent the past three years looking at life through a glass, not that I hadn't done so throughout most of my childhood but those previous few years had been much stricter.

"What is it you wish to do in the city today, Milady?" Grey's question never made me stir from my people counting.

"I don't know." I answered, then I saw the fattest man I had ever witness waddle out of a restaurant looking fit to burst, he very much reminded me of a sea lion which caused me to snicker.

"You don't? I thought you must've had some sort of plan for wanting to leave so suddenly. Perhaps wanting to visit some place sentimental, like the Orphanage you hail from, the Queen has told myself and Phipps many a story of how fondly you hold that place." I growled.

"All your jabbering made me lose count!" I exclaimed with a huff.

"Forgive me, I hadn't known you were counting anything and you _did_ tell me you dislike quietness." His amused smile only caused me to sigh.

"Well next time ask."

"Ask what? If I may inquire."

"If I'm counting! Next time ask me if I'm counting!" I responded hotly.

"Does Milady count often?" He questioned as he rested his head in his hand.

"When I'm bored and have nothing better to do I count anything I find an abundance of or anything I've seen a pattern in." I looked back out the window, the general populace of the area had multiplied greatly it wouldn't have mattered if he'd stayed silent or not I would've lost count eventually.

The city was very dank that afternoon, dreary sky's and all that rubbish. I didn't mind the dankness in the air much it only made the fact that I'd returned all the more real, how glad I was to be back.

"Are you counting now, Milady?"

"No! I want to go into the pastry shop." I said as I frowned to the man whose eyes lit up at the mention of pastry's.

Inside the quaint shop people made a path for me to walk and bowed as I passed I didn't bother with them much though as I looked at the various sweets before me, many pies, cakes, and tart's lined the shelves, I looked to Grey.

"You're buying something for yourself." I ordered, "you won't guard me properly if you're hungry and therefore will be of no use to me." He didn't give me any sort of argument which was quite the disappointment, but ultimately a good thing. Grey was busy looking at the sweets in the shop I had found the opportunity to sneak away from him which I did promptly. I went to the driver of my carriage and told him to go straight on, he did as told of course. Meanwhile I went in the opposite direction off on my own, I had lost many a guard before and each time I did so the gent would be close to quitting his job, then again none of those guards were worth having and I wagered the Earl Grey was no different.

As I hurried on to get far away from the pastry shop I began to get absorbed into the look of the city, I had long since forgotten how marvelous it was. I went from store to store just looking but not buying anything, most citizens recognized me and began whispering their doubts to my sudden return and lonely outing, others didn't even notice my presences which I greatly enjoyed. I rounded a corner and carelessly bumped into someone much smaller than I, glancing down my nose I witnessed a small noble boy sporting raven hair, and an eye patch, he was accompanied by a butler dressed all in black, quite the contrary to Grey I should think.

"Pardon me." I said as I moved to pass them.

"Princess Frederique?" The boy questioned.

"No, no, no Princess here, good day little one." I exclaimed as I continued on, the boy had given little more than a shrug to my response before going on his way.

On another street I stopped as I noticed Grey exiting a shop I had visited earlier on, he was tracking me down but I wasn't ready to be caught just yet, I was quick to hide just inside an alleyway and watched as he ran past blindly going by the very thing he was looking for. I snickered cruelly at the expression I'd glimpsed on his face just before hiding, he seemed so horribly concerned and disheveled that serious face really didn't suit him, which made it all the more comical.

I continued on down a narrow shop way which was full of merchants and patrons, when something caught my eye. A book, new and leathery 'The Runaway Marionette' with an illustration of a puppeteer's hands holding nothing but empty strings. At first I had only thought it appropriate for the situation at hand but as I continued to inspect it I discovered a growing interest in the piece of literature. I began to approach the stores entrance when:

"Ah-ha!" Grey jumped just before me a wide grin on his face, "playing the role of fugitive are we? I'll admit it was clever to send your horsemen off on his own so that I'd think you'd left inside, but now the game's over." I smirked cheekily up to him.

"A game you say? You didn't seem to think it a very fun game when you were scrambling around all panicked and ruffled. I've seen a dog have an easier time of catching his tail."

"Well I caught you in the end didn't I? Obviously it was a game which I've won." He began to lead me out of the cramped market place.

"Hadn't I stopped to admire that books irony you wouldn't have caught me, don't be full of yourself." The Earl laughed heartily at that.

"No, it wasn't the doing of a book, Milady, I'm afraid you were given up!"

"Given up?! By whom?!" I cried.

"A young Earl Phantomhive. Said he bumped you going 'round a corner and pointed me straight to you."

"Can't trust anyone with an obvious secret these days. Well at any rate let's see if you can keep up!" I turned into a sudden sprint, leaving the white guard in my dust, he hurried along after me and was quick to catch up until we got into the thick of a crowd then I lost him once again and hurried on to my carriage, I gave my horsemen the order to take me on to the palace and he did as I commanded, leaving the foolish Earl behind once more.

Once I arrived back at the palace I snuck inside quietly only to be stopped by the other half of Double Charles, the one whose face was as stern as stone which unnerved me somewhat.

"Welcome back, Princess Frederique." He said with a bow, "where might your guard be?" He questioned.

"Who knows? Obviously he's not very good at his job, otherwise he'd be here now wouldn't he."

"Actually," I turned to see Grey approaching us, "I'm present so I believe that would make me very good at my job." My mouth dropped open, there was no possible way he could have made it to the palace from the center of the city in nearly the same timely manner as I! I had left him stranded!

"What the devil?!" I cried in frustration, the rascally Earl smiled down on me.

"When I saw the carriage driving off I chased after it, luckily I was able to latch on to the back of it and ride on comfortably." His grin only widened, "need I remind the Lady that I've served as her Majesty's butler for nearly three years? Surely you wouldn't think so poorly of the skill of Her Majesty's hand chosen subjects?"

"You need not remind me of anything! I have indeed thought lowly of your skill and will continue to do so, not because you're lacking in ability but simply because I don't want to admit that you're right." I crossed my arms over my chest with a huff of frustration, Grey chuckled at my reaction earning a strict glare from Phipps.

"A servant should never laugh at their Master." He stated immediately killing Grey's boast.

"I'm tired, I want a soak." I demanded as I walked off from the two, Phipps called on the Maid of the house whom prepared my bath.

As I sat in a large tub filled with sweet smelling hot water, my legs carelessly propped up and crossed one over the other on one side of the tub, the maid of the house entered sheepishly.

"Princess, Earl Grey told me to let you know that he got this for you." She then showed me a book titled 'The Runaway Marionette' at first I just gawked blankly at it before jolting forward, causing the bath's water to stir and splash about, snatching it out of the maid's hands.

"Whaaaaaat?!" I cried, as I looked on the cover.

"H-he said he noticed you admiring it in a shop window and- "

"Grey!" I shouted, knowing he would be nearby, "get in here _now_!" As I finished my order Grey swiftly appeared in the room.

"You called Milady?" He questioned.

"When in the hell did you get the time to purchase this?!" I growled.

"I observed you looking at it through the glass of the bookstore, I'd snuck up behind you then, and so once we arrived at the palace I sent someone to fetch it for you. It only just arrived a few moments ago." He was mocking me, beating me at my own game and trying to play it off as though he were being sincere, I had never felt so livid.

"Is this supposed to be your idea of wooing?" I questioned, as I realized he'd been toying with me as a boy would do to a girl on the playground, the white haired Earl laughed at that.

"It's effective enough wouldn't you agree, Milady?" I felt my mouth twitch.

"How so?"

"Well, I've gotten all your attention as well as been invited to see you stripped." The last part caused me to realize that I had indeed invited him in as I was bathing, I began to feel as though my head would explode from the immense rage I felt then, and I found a strained smile steal onto my lips.

"I suggest you leave before I take this book and shove it somewhere you wouldn't find very pleasant." The Earl raised his hands in surrender before exiting the room.

I dropped my new book onto the floor as I sank into the water so that my nose stayed above the bath's sweet water. Never had a guard turned the tables on me before, never had one treated me in such a way then again no man had treated me in that way either, both had always treated me as my title would imply, as though I were made of porcelain which was what made them so easy to toy with. I very much disliked the fact that Grey had made me look the fool instead of vice-versa and so it's reasonable to say that I didn't understand why I ended up smiling as I thought on the entire ordeal. I sat up so that my mouth was above the waterline.

"Irene." I spoke the maid's name flatly and still yet the jumpy woman took a fright.

"Yes, Milady?"

"Go send Grey my thanks for the book." I sighed blankly, and I noticed a smile come to the woman's face before she took her bow.

"Of course." She turned.

"Oh and, Irene," the maid looked back to me, I felt the most wicked smirk sneak onto my lips as I spoke. "Be sure to tell him that: next time I'll leave him stranded in the middle of a manure field." Her face flushed a bit.

"R-right…"

The next morning, I woke to the bright shine of the sun in my eye and watched as the silhouette of Earl Grey moved away from the window.

"It's time to wake up now, Milady." Grey's voice was overly smooth, I replied by pulling the comforter over my head.

"Don't wake me that way the sun's horrible and it should die." I grumbled, Grey merely laughed in response. "And don't you dare 'Milady' me first thing in the morning, it makes me feel like I'm immediately supposed to work. I'm not getting out of bed today."

"But you _are_ immediately supposed to work, a royal's labor is never done." He said and I felt him lift the covers from my face, "and as unpleasant as it may be you must wake up."

"No. Get out of my room." I ordered, he laughed once more which made me growl, "if you laugh one more damn time I'll have you executed!" I exclaimed venomously, I wasn't a morning person everything I looked at angered me when I woke up, I recall kicking a chair across a room once for no reason I was just simply annoyed by its very existence. "Why are you even here? You're not the one who's supposed to wake me! That's Irene's job!"

"Forgive me, Milady. I was warned that this was the most difficult part of the maid's job and told her that I would take over this morning." I looked to him for the first time then, his amused smirk made me want to send him flying across the room just as I had done with the chair.

"Fine then, my first order to you is this: get the hell out of my room and go kill that devil's spawn labeled the sun!" I could see Grey trying his best to hold back a snicker.

"I don't believe the sun was spawned from Satan, Mistress."

"Who's to say? Hell's blistering yes? Fire, brimstone, and all that who's to say that hell isn't the sun? Who's to say that isn't where Lucifer resides?" I was glaring at him furiously then, he only blinked a few times.

"W-well I- "

"Well nothing." I exclaimed, "who's to say indeed, you're not to say that's for certain. As far as I'm concerned you can go straight to the sun and rot alongside Jack the Ripper and Albert Fish!"

"My, my, you've got quite a sharp tongue first thing in the morning!" He exclaimed with a nervy smile, I finally sat upright, my glare still hard and Icey.

"Yes I do, don't wake me again Earl Grey, I don't wish to see your ridiculous mug as soon as I wake or hear your disrespectful laughter. Send Irene in this instant." The look on his face told me that he realized what a huge mistake he had made, he bowed to me before hurrying out of the room. I was harsh with him during the time when I was completely awake, but there is a big difference between harsh and malevolent the latter is how I felt when I first woke, everything and everyone I looked at should drop dead and leave me alone! That's what it was like in the mornings, well for me anyway.

I then began to understand why Irene was so jittery around me all the time, the first time we'd met was when she had been sent in to wake me and it had gone no better than it the current incident with Grey, much worse in fact.

After breakfast with Mother I found myself sitting in the palace library, staring out the window while tugging on my ear and running my fingers over the small birth mark on the back of it.

"There you are, Freddy!" I turned my head, my fingers never leaving my ear lobe, and saw Grey hurrying toward me. "I've been searching all around for you. After your breakfast meeting with the Queen you disappeared, may I be so bold as to ask why?" As I continued to fidget with my ear lobe I flashed him the best smirk I could muster.

"Another game of course, congratulations you've won yet again." I stated calmly, Grey raised a brow at me in response.

"With all due respect, Mistress, it was obviously not a game. Otherwise you would've gone through something at least somewhat elaborate."

"Oh? What's this? You think you've got my games figured out do you?"

"Certainly." He said, "but besides that, I notice you're fidgeting considerably I'm assuming something happened." I sighed at that.

"It's not a big deal really, Mother wants to find a husband for me she's going to be holding a ball here in the palace for those of suitable title."

"You're right it's not a big deal, then why do you twitch so?" He questioned, his prying was out of line and due to my ranking I should've warned him to keep his nose out of it, but I didn't of course.

"I don't want to wed. Not so soon anyway."

"So soon?" He echoed, "forgive me, Milady, but most women your age have been joined for at least a few years' now."

"Yes, yes I know that! I've no interest though, not in marriage, not in love, nor in sex, I've got no interest in the entire ordeal it seems trivial to me." I was speaking out of line then as well, no royal should ever speak of such things as love, or sex with a servant especially not a male servant!

"No interest?!" His tone was quite surprised, "forgive me, Milady, but I've never heard of such a thing, not from anyone."

"Yes, well, to me there are more important things to do than think on such things."

"Such as?"

"The future, thinking of what will be and what should be, those things are important as well as the right now, which would appear to be the only time I've got to see as much of her as I can before... The future becomes present." I had then begun to bite my lip as my nerves had continued to stress and cause me great anxiety.

"Calm down, Freddy, you're becoming asthmatic!" My breathing had indeed picked up as my anxiety increased, short quick gasps where coming from my lungs.

"It's not asthma it's a panic attack." I said between breaths as I began to tremble.

"I'll call a doctor!" He exclaimed, I grabbed his arm with a trembling hand.

"No! I…" I took a deep breath, "it won't help, it will end soon." I said as I tried to calm my breathing, Grey knelt down next to me, keeping a hold on my hand.

"But Milady, you've a history of asthma as well, wouldn't you think it to be an issue in this instance?"

"Ma…Maybe… But…" I coughed.

"I'm sorry, Milady, I hadn't known that talking of your future marriage would distress you so much." He said quietly, I shook my head as I began to feel light headed.

"No, it's not that. It's Mother… She's not well." The look in his eye told me he hadn't been informed yet. "She's going to leave me soon, just like Papa did." I said quietly, Grey placed his hand on my back, which was quite forthcoming, and told me to calm my breathing. I felt that, had I been well and he'd said such a thing, I would've snapped at him and so I tried my best to do so: "you're hardly my senior don't father me, or I shall send you to the sun as I threatened earlier." I had meant the threat to be venomous but it came out more like a plea.

I wasn't ready to marry, I wasn't ready for Mother to die, wasn't ready to be alone again, and I certainly wasn't ready to become the Queen of England. I was too immature and childish for such a thing, I had indeed been taught how to run a country and I was still learning, but that didn't mean I would be good at it! I could never do as well as Mother had I couldn't do it, I would let my country down.

My breathing had calmed and my trembling lessened after around ten minutes of panic, and yet I hadn't shed a single tear over the entire affair. My asthma was becoming an issue, I'd begun to wheeze then and I felt as though a clamp was over my lungs.

"Are you alright now?" He questioned, I stood from my seat too quickly and the room spun, I wobbled for a moment before gaining balance.

"Grey. You will tell no one of the episode I just took." I ordered, he stood then, I noticed under the sound of my wheezy breaths it felt and advertised as though something was rattling in my chest.

"But Milady wouldn't it be wise to have a doctor- "

"What did I just say to you?" I growled, "tell no one." I was still feeling light headed and so my steps were actually staggers, Grey tried to help me along but I shook him off. "I don't need the help of a man to do something so simple." A surprisingly firm grip took my arm as Grey helped to steady me. "What do you think you're- "

"Milady may think she isn't in need of assistance, but she is. Besides, you said yourself, 'mild men are of no use to the royal family' it would be extremely mild of me to allow a wobbly legged princess to bully me into letting her teeter dangerously up the stairwell wouldn't it?" That mischievous smile of his appeared once again as he helped me climb the stairs.

"…When on earth did I ever say that?" I questioned weakly, he looked to me suspiciously.

"What? You mean you don't remember? Well that's no matter anyhow, up to bed and rest for you." Grey exclaimed.

"You're no doctor, I shouldn't have to listen to you!" I wheezed while pushing him away from me then a fit of coughs took me.

"Not a doctor at all, no, and you don't have to listen to anything I say. Luckily listening isn't the issue here, it's physically getting you up to bed which is the issue." For whatever reason a smile stayed plastered on his lips as he took me to my room and instructed Irene to get me into bed.

As I lay in my night gown, a thermometer in my mouth and a damp cloth on my head, a knock sounded at the door, Irene went to answer; Grey stepped inside and immediately approached my bedside.

"You wipe that smug grin off your face you stupid sot!" I grumbled as I tried to keep the thermometer in my mouth, which Irene quickly removed.

"Forgive me, Feddy, but- "

"PRINCESS!" I began to cough once again Irene rubbed my back. I was in no mood for him to patronize me and hadn't the want to hear him speak my name.

"Excuse me. Forgive me, _Princess_ , but I can't help but to grin when I'm amused." He said as he crossed his arms.

"What kind of butler laughs at their Mistress when she's ill?" I questioned with a glare.

"That's not it at all," he said quickly, "I was just remembering how you said just this morning that you wished to stay in bed all day, and now you've gotten just what you wished for."

"Sarcastic Mongrel!" I barked, he chuckled once again.

"I suppose this would be the right time to say 'be careful what you wish for'." His snickering caused my brow to twitch. Why was it that he always seemed to best me?! How infuriating he was!

"One hundred laps!" I exclaimed suddenly, Grey stood up straight.

"Pardon?"

"One hundred laps! You are to run one hundred laps around the perimeter of the palace." I ordered, and I watched the Earl's ego deflate right then.

"B-but why?" He questioned, and smirked to him evilly.

"Inappropriate behavior toward your Mistress, as punishment you'll run one hundred laps around the perimeter, or at least until you drop from exhaustion." I turned to the Maid, "Irene, go inform Phipps of Grey's punishment tell him to keep an eye on him and make sure he runs."

"Y-yes, Milady! Right away!" She hurried out of the room, by then Grey was looking quite nervous. I had no doubt that he could run one hundred laps easily, but running around the perimeter of the castle would be devastating due to its colossal size.

"And Grey, keep in mind that Phipps won't be the only one watching, I'll be able to see you through my window so I will know quickly if you don't do the exercise." He gave me a nervous laugh.

"The Princess is so cruel." He said as a look of total defeat took to his face, I laughed at that.

"Actually, it's Freddy."

As he sulked out of the room I smiled, if that Earl was good for anything it was allowing me a smile when I was most stressed. Perhaps he would be worth something after all, if only worth jesting at every now and then.


	3. Chapter 3

Ghost

A/N: Sorry for the delay, Readers, but I decided to post the chapters all at once, I was working very hard on this in the time I had you waiting. Please enjoy, reviews are much appreciated.

The morning after my asthma induced illness, I was feeling considerably better and my fever had gone down as well. When I saw Grey next I noticed his body was particularly stiff and his movements were somewhat strained, it was probably from all the running I'd sentenced him to the day before hand, I chuckled at his obvious discomfort.

"Good Morning, Earl Grey, how are you feeling?" I questioned with a knowing smirk.

"My legs feel as though they've got cinder blocks tied to them." He grumbled with a deep frown.

"Well let's hope that means you've learned your lesson. Though I'm sure you haven't." I passed him by quickly and he fell in behind me. If I were to run away from him that day, he would have a much more difficult time of catching me.

Breakfast with Mother once again, I inspected her more closely that time 'round and I noticed her skin was tinged yellow, which wouldn't have been noticeable to anyone who wasn't looking for it. She spoke to me as though nothing was wrong, but I knew from what she had told me the morning before that she was in constant, unwavering, pain. Her yellowness would become more and more prominent as her illness worsened, and she would only become weaker.

"Freddy Dear."

"Yes Mother?"

"I heard of your mischief in the market place yesterday. I knew that Grey would give you a run for your money." She gave me a cheeky grin.

"I knew it! You assigned him to me just to give me a hard time!" I cried.

"No I assigned him to you because I wanted you to understand what it's like to be around you all the time."

"Mother! I'm not so dim-wittedly arrogant!"

"Oh, yes, Dear, yes you are."

"Surely not! You're merely fooling with me aren't you, Mother?!" I was somewhat frazzled at the thought of being like Grey, I knew we were cut from the same cloth but surely it was only due to our tomfoolery and nothing else.

"I'm not at all. You're just as dim-witted and twice as childish." Mother said as she took a bite of egg.

"Oh no…" I felt a pout form on my lips.

"But it's more acceptable for you to be so, since you can simply bat your doll eyes and make everyone's anger melt away." At the mention of my eyes and making people melt I found myself thinking of Charlotte once again, I'd been doing it a lot recently and I had even dreamt of her the night before… Hopefully, she was better off in reality than she was in my nightmare.

"Grey." I called him as I exited the dining room, the creaky butler came after me. "We're going out, now."

"Milady, do you plan to pull yet another vanishing act?" He questioned, as we exited the palace and descended the stairwell.

"No. I'm simply acting on something you proposed the day before yesterday." I answered while entering the stagecoach.

"What might that be?"

"A visit, to the Poorhouse I'm from. We won't be staying long though, I only need a bit of information."

Riding along through the city I once again began counting people, more specifically, children. I didn't have many memories of the Orphanage and what I did have were hazy, all I had which was clear was Charlotte. I hadn't any idea why I wished to seek her out then and I most certainly didn't know what I would do once I found her or if she would even want to see me, or if she would be able to recognize me. At some point my counting had stopped as my worries took over completely.

"Are you counting Milady?" Grey's question caused me to sigh weakly.

"Not anymore."

The Orphanage was much older looking than I remembered it to be and seemed much smaller, lots of cracks in the buildings stone, much greenery growing up its walls, the only thing which hadn't changed was the many children playing in the yard.

Entering through the gate all the children stopped to gaze on me and I wondered if I had looked at Mother the same way when she entered the Poorhouse. Through the entrance, down the hall, to the right, an office, as a child I had traveled that path more times than I could count and I could have easily walked it blindfolded. It was the office of Mean Ol' Mrs. Jackson, as I looked in I saw the very same sour-faced lady so many of us children disliked. I knocked thrice on the open door attracting the much older woman's attention, for a moment her eyes widened in shock then they narrowed once again.

"What in the hell do ya want from me now, Freddy?" She growled, her horrible voice had aged just as much as her face. "Thought I got rid o' ya fourteen years ago."

"I want you to answer a question for me, Dinosaur Lady." I responded by using the nickname I'd dubbed her.

"Bah!" She shouted as she threw her hands in the air, "I've no time for yer stupid questions, away with ya!" She exclaimed, Grey stepped before me.

"Do not speak to the Princess in such a way! Such disrespect will have you hanged!" He said sternly.

"Did I tell you to open your mouth?" I questioned, "no, I didn't. Stand quietly and don't interrupt us again, or I'll have you run 'round the palace again only this time it will be two hundred laps!" I witnessed the Earl bite his tongue at my threat.

"Laps eh?" Mrs. Jackson stood from her chair, she was much shorter then, not only due to my growth but also because of a hunch in her spine. "Giving him the punishment I used to give the boy's, I could get cha for plagiarism ya know."

"Next time I'll be sure to put your name on the punishment. I'll call it: The Jackson Run." As I said the name the old woman scoffed and went to a book shelf.

"Why've ya come here?" She questioned, I could tell she was tiring of my presence.

"I wanted to know if you have any idea where Charlie ended up?" As soon as I finished my sentence she met with a reply.

"Last I saw her was some years ago. Witnessed her leaving with a packed bag, said she'd gotten a job in the city somewhere on York Street I believe. Not sure if she's there or not but ya should check anyhow if only so that ya won't be in my Home anymore."

"Alright then, I appreciate it. Oh and don't worry I'll be sure to attend your upcoming funeral." I said as I turned and left.

"I've outlived many a child whose come up from here, I'm sure I'll be alive and kickin' when yer six feet under!" The hag called.

"On to York Street." I said to the coachmen, then Grey intervened.

"Milady, I can't allow you to go there."

"Can't allow me?" I echoed as I placed a hand on my hip, "you don't allow anything! I'm your Mistress!"

"Yes, and I'm your guard I'm to keep you out of harm's way which cannot be done if we travel to such a dangerous part of the city."

"We're going to York Street."

"No. Anywhere else is fine, but not there."

"Don't disobey me Grey! Or I should have you do more than run laps!" I threatened emptily.

"In this instance I know what's best and so you wouldn't be allowed to deliver punishment which isn't necessary. Anywhere else in the city but York Street." I wanted to argue further but I knew there would be no use in it, he clearly wasn't going to concede to my demands. I huffed in resentment.

"Fine then!" I exclaimed, "into the city." I ordered the coachmen before loading inside the carriage.

"Come now, Milady, there's no need to pout like a child." Grey teased as we rode along, I shot him a glare.

"And there's no need for you to treat me as such. I'm a grown woman after all I can handle myself, I shouldn't need you at all, Disrespectful Mongrel!" I complained as I crossed my arms over my chest.

"Handle yourself?" He echoed, "no, no, I know not. You couldn't do anything if someone were to attack you."

"Who's to say?!" I questioned, "who's to say I haven't already had to defend myself in such a way?" He raised a brow at my hypothetical, "I've snuck away from many a guard, how do you know that I've not already been attacked and fended for myself?"

"Is that the case?" He suddenly became very serious, almost angry in his expression.

"Once or twice yes. But only that many and no more. Like I said I can handle myself."

"But that's not your job." The statement caught my attention, "your job will soon be to handle the country which is why we servants handle you." I had no way to respond to such a fact.

In the most crowded section of the city Grey was making sure to stick by me closely, he clearly didn't trust me after the stunt I'd pulled on our last outing. What a bother he was, I had to get to York Street somehow and I couldn't do so with him around. I doubted that he would fall for my pastry shop trick again I would have to think up a different distraction.

I had only just begun to ponder on the subject when I saw a familiar face, the child I had run into a day ago the one who wore an eyepatch, and had jet black butler at his side, the one whom had given me up. He stood directly before me and bowed politely.

"You little tattler." I said with narrow eyes, the young noble seemed surprised at my words. "Giving me up so easily when I obviously wasn't meant to be."

"Forgive me, Princess, but royalty shouldn't be out on the streets alone." He said.

"That doesn't change the fact that you're a tattler, and I'm not too fond of you thus far." I said coldly, the boy seemed slightly perturbed by my words but, given my monarchy, I couldn't think of anyone who wouldn't be.

"Um, Milady," Grey chimed in, "allow me to introduce you to Ciel Phantomhive, he's the Queen's Guard Dog." I recognized the title immediately.

"Oh such a little child is the pooch which my Mother speaks so highly of? I'm surprised." The boy's eyes seemed to gain a glimmer of pride in them at the mention of my Mothers fondness to him. "But unimpressed. Goodbye, little pup. Be sure to keep fetching and all that." I lightly placed a hand on his head as I passed him by, I knew nothing of the boy but I could tell being treated like a child infuriated him so I decided to bully him a bit.

"Er…Milady?" Grey seemed somewhat unsure of my actions.

"What is it now?"

"I was just wondering: was it such a good idea to treat the Queen's dog in such a way? I mean needless to say he's a brat but..." I chuckled at that.

"Does it matter? I was upset at the boy and he looked in need of humbling anyway. He should be fine."

More shopping, more buying, things were dull as I went on but then something happened, a loud crash just behind us I turned in time to see an out of control carriage barreling towards us, I was quick to step aside but when I did so Grey had stepped forward and ended up bumping into me before wrapping his arms around me and pulling me out of the way narrowly avoiding my being hit by the coach.

"Are they alright?" I questioned as I looked on the wreckage, it seemed quite serious.

"Are you alright?" Grey questioned, not bothering to even look at the scene.

"Never mind me!" I exclaimed while pulling out of his arms. "go help those people!" I ordered sternly, "they could be hurt!" Hearing the seriousness of my tone Grey leapt into action quickly, and hurried to the turned over coach. I took the opportunity to sneak away from the scene undetected.

I hadn't a clue where York Street was, but it was easy enough to ask directions and find my way from then on. Luckily the place wasn't too far from where I was and I could walk it effortlessly, however, I realized it would also be a nuisance. Once Grey saw that I was missing he would know where I'd run to and come find me quickly, I had to be fast in my search.

The street was grimy and dark, people loitered about on the ground and such. I'd bumped into a woman and asked about Charlotte, described what I could remember of her.

"Don't know no Charlotte," the woman answered, "might you be talkin' 'bout Charlie Chains?" She questioned, I had never known Charlottes' last name so I wasn't for certain.

"Possibly, do you have any idea where I could find her?" I questioned.

"I might, but that information doesn't come cheap." She began to rub her fingers together greedily; I was quick to compensate her with some ten pounds. "You should find her in that alleyway." The dirty woman pointed just ahead.

"I appreciate your help." I said as I hurried by her and directly into the alleyway. I hadn't thought it possible but somehow that area was much filthier than the first, I would be lying if I said I wasn't on edge.

A small fire was burning inside of a steal garbage bin, two people stood by it and one sat in the filth of trash off to the side, that person was familiar to me, greasy blond hair which I had remember to be shiny and full, dull brown eyes which I had recalled to be full of adventure, ghastly grey skin which I had once known to be a healthy tanned color.

"Charlie?" I questioned, the woman who sat in the slums raised her eyes in response, for a long moment she stared blankly at me but it didn't take long for recognition to come.

"F-Freddy?" Her voice was hoarse and cracked when she spoke my name.

"Yes it's me." I answered meekly. Charlotte stood up quickly and approached me.

"Wha-what're you doing here?!" She questioned, "why did you come here?" I noticed she was jittering and twitching quite a bit.

"I-I just wanted to see you again, that's all, nothing more. I haven't received a letter from you in some years now…" I answered as I felt my eyes become teary.

"Can't receive letters if ya ain't got an address, right Charlie?" One of the people near the fire called.

"Shut it!" Charlotte shouted with a twitch.

"No address?" I questioned, "I don't understand, Dinosaur Lady said you got a job here shouldn't you have a place to- "

"It's not the kind of job you think, Freddy." Charlotte said with a look of embarrassment in her eyes.

"Well what kind of job is it?" I questioned, one of the people near the fire laughed aloud.

"It should be obvious shouldn't it? She's a streetwalker! A whore!"

"I said: SHUT IT!" Charlotte screamed back to them, before turning to me her fidgeting becoming worse. I didn't know how to respond. Charlie? Homeless? A streetwalker?

"I thought… I remember you talking about…. Becoming a doctor…" I said slowly.

"…It started that way… Can't get the proper schooling if you ain't got money, right? So I took up hooking to get some cash and pay for tuition but… The money was just so good that I couldn't… I couldn't get out…"

"B-but you, you live here? And yet you say you make good money?" I could feel my lungs beginning to tighten up, how had this happened to Charlotte? She had so much potential and such good intentions.

"The drugs take all 'er money don't cha know?" One of the people near the fire answered for Charlie once again, "spent 'er last pound a week ago she did, now she's jitterin' and twitchin' 'cause she ain't had no fix in a while!"

"KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT!" Charlie screamed, then she turned to me once again. "Freddy it was really great seeing you again, and I'm glad you stopped by. I wonder if you might loan me a pound or two before you leave?"

"Wh-what?" I questioned in pure shock.

"Ya know to make the twitching stop." She explained, I backed away as I felt the back of my eyes grow hot with the impending threat of tears.

"No." I stated, "I can't…. Help you fuel a habit that's destroyed your life." Her face dropped.

"What good are you then?!" Charlie shouted, "I help you get into the palace and what do I get in return?! NOTHING! You always were a fickle little brat!"

"You don't mean that." I said as my breathing became labored, tears gathered at my eyes edge finally and I realized I should've listened to Grey.

"Yes I do! You were good for nothing at the Home and you're good for nothing now! Leave! Leave and don't come back here you bitch!" Charlotte shoved me then, and I backed away. "GO ALREADY!"

I turned and walked away at an even pace, I was shocked by what Charlie had become by what the streets had made her the Charlie I knew may as well have been dead. My breathing was slightly strained as I went on and I knew I should've rested, but I had to power through it wouldn't be safe for me there any longer. A firm grip took my arm and, without looking first, I swung at the one who had grabbed me landing a solid punch to their head, I'd hit them hard enough for them to stagger a bit but their grip stayed firm on my arm. Then I realized as he slowly moved to face me, that it was Grey whom I'd struck and it was he who glared down at me then. I was stunned, had I known it was him I wouldn't have swung, I blinked and felt a hot tear roll down my face.

"I didn't mean to…" I trailed off unable to think of what else to say.

"Let's go." He began to pull me away from the filthy York Street, and I allowed him to he had been right after all. He didn't speak a word to me as we sat in the stagecoach.

"You're upset with me." I stated, he sighed.

"You fooled me in the worst way, acting as though you cared about those people's lives then going off to endanger your own." His words were near growls.

"I did indeed care about those people, and I knew you would take care of them, it just so happened to be the right time to sneak off and find Charlie."

"Yes and how did that go?" He questioned with venom, "swimmingly I'd imagine!"

"Swimmingly indeed." I said miserably while lowering my gaze, he sighed as though I were hopeless which I very well may have been. "I'm sorry." I said pitifully, which caused him to jump in surprise a look of shock on his face. "I was wrong to do what I did, all of it was wrong."

"A Princess should never apologize to her servants…" He responded.

"Not even if I was completely wrong and silly enough to ignore my servant's advice?"

"Not even then."

"Hmph, only arrogant fools wouldn't apologize then." I said and I noticed a small smirk on his face. "Your cheeks swelling." I pointed out, he raised a hand to the offended area.

"Yes, well, if anything I know you're armed with a powerful punch. Nearly knocked me off my feet." I couldn't help but to chuckle at that.

"I've never seen you look as sidesplitting as you do now!"

"Yes, well one would appear so with half their face swelling." He snickered as well.

Grey had calmed me quickly, once I realized it was he who had hold of me back in York Street my breathing eased and as we rode along in the coach I could only feel the pressure on my lungs lessening as we went. The ride continued with bits of chatter here and there until eventually I found my eyes were becoming as heavy as stone, I struggled to keep them open and to keep my head up but ultimately I ended up dozing in the stagecoach, hopefully Grey wouldn't do anything ridiculous while I was sleeping.


	4. Chapter 4

Play Thing

Several months had passed with much of mine and Grey's tomfoolery which became both more irritating but also more enjoyable as it continued. The day had come, the day when I would dance with all the eligible Lords and Princes from all 'round and then, possibly, choose one to be my husband.

"Milady you've never looked so lovely!" Irene exclaimed as she ran her hand over my ball gown: another gown fit for a porcelain doll, fuchsia with black ribbons and frills, leaving my shoulders exposed, my long midnight ringlets fashioned up in a magnificent curl ridden bun, with one small portion of curls left dangling down my shoulder.

"Thank you, Irene." I said with dread in my voice, did I really have to go dance with all the eligible men whom awaited my presence in the ballroom?

"Princess, the sooner you do it the sooner it'll be over with you know." Irene advised as she placed a fuchsia rose in my raven locks.

"Yes… I know… But I'd really rather not do this at all…" The maid giggled at my reluctance as she continued to fix me up. The rooms door opened without warning and my mother drifted toward me.

"Oh Freddy, you're just like a doll." The compliment was nothing new and by that point I rather disliked it.

"Thank you." I said as I inspected Mother's face closely. Her skin had indeed yellowed more so than before, no amount of makeup could hide it then only lessen the pigment, her eyes were constantly tired looking as her pain kept her up through the night, she had also lost weight, too much weight, and her hair had begun to thin and fall out. But as I looked on her then she wore an ash grey colored wig and a black hat with a veil so that she could cover her face and hide the yellowness more thoroughly.

"You must hurry now, Dear, everyone is waiting your entrance. I'm sure you'll dazzle every man who anxiously awaits to dance with England's Porcelain Princess." Mother said as she held my hand tightly, she had been waiting so long for that day that much I knew, as well as the fact that she wanted to see me married to someone she knew would look after me before she passed. However, I could take care of myself I had no need for a husband, but, seeing me joined would bring Mother happiness and so I couldn't refuse the union.

"I'll be sure to hurry down." I said and Mother gave my hand a squeeze before leaving me to continue preparing.

I glided down the grand staircase as elegantly as I could manage and I noticed all eyes were on me which was something I had become accustomed to but still felt very uncomfortable with. Shortly after my entrance all the ladies and gents began to dance and such.

My first dance of the night went to the Prince of France, Mother very much favored the young man, however, I found him snooty and overbearing also I very much disliked his choice in cologne.

The second dance was with a Lord from South America whom was very wealthy due to his success in the cotton industry, he was a handsome, strong man, with a country accent that I found charming, but beauty is only skin deep as his personality was horrible. As we danced he spoke of slave trade and such, the dance was cut short when I told him just what I thought of slavery and those who claimed to own such unfortunate people. I certainly wouldn't marry such a cruel man, if I could've I would have seen him hanged right then and there.

I danced with many other bachelors some older some younger, but found I had no particular interest in any of them and I also discovered that most of them were terribly corrupt in one way or another, if it were due to their wealth then I surely would be better off marrying a peasant.

"How horrid." I mumbled to myself as I stood off to the side of the dancefloor.

"Not enjoying yourself, Freddy?" I turned to find Grey smiling down at me.

"Not particularly, no." I said truthfully with a yawn, "it's boring, not a single one of these blokes has made me laugh or even snicker, not once. A conversation isn't a good one without laughter."

"Perhaps, Milady would better enjoy herself if she danced with me?" He offered me his hand.

"Is that allowed? You are my butler after all." I said with a tilt of my head.

"Not tonight, I was invited as a guest." He answered with a sneaky grin, I took his hand.

"Very well then." We took to the floor. As we talked idly and danced I noticed Mothers Guard Dog dancing with a young blond girl. "I say, the Tattler is here!" I exclaimed causing Grey to look as well.

"Ah, yes he's with his fiancée." Grey said matter-of-factly.

"Huh? Fiancée? Those two couldn't be older than twelve and yet it's already been decided that they'll spend the rest of their lives together? How depressing." I sighed, "I would tattle on people too if that were my situation." Grey laughed.

"Oh? You plan to become a snitch once you're joined?" He questioned.

"Perhaps, but I'll probably only be snitching on you, Sarcastic Mongrel." I grinned.

"To whom would you snitch? You'd be the Queen after all." Grey questioned with an amused smirk.

"To your mother." I said evilly, Grey was quick to respond.

"Oh, no, no, we can do without that thank you!" He gave me a crooked smile and I laughed at the fear in his tone.

"Well now I know at least two of your weaknesses!" I exclaimed, he raised a brow.

"Two of them?"

"Mm-hmm: Sweets and your mother."

"Actually there are three weaknesses of mine, you left one out."

"Oh? Do tell."

"You of course, Milady!" He exclaimed and I stuttered.

"Wha? Me?"

"Yes, Milady's punishments are quite terrifying!"

"They're not that bad!"

"Just last week you threatened to have me swim the river with a fifty-pound pack tied to me! And actually forced me to run the perimeter of the city while following along by stagecoach!" I laughed once again. "It was painful to say the least."

"But did you die?" I questioned in response, his grin only widened.

"Nearly!"

"Well, as they say: what doesn't kill you makes you stronger!"

"I suppose that would be similar to the one about sticks and stones."

"Hmm… Sticks and stones eh? You may have just given me a new idea." The Earls expression dropped at my words.

"Dear God what have I done…" I snickered at his worry and then our dance ended, it was the more enjoyable dance of the night I had to admit and he did lighten my mood which would come in handy for the other bachelors I would have to dance with.

Once the party ended I was quick to retire to a warm bath, I'd been on my feet all evening and found myself to be quite exhausted from the whole thing. The door opened without warning once again as Mother entered with excitement in her still tired eyes.

"So? How was it? Did anyone stick out to you? Anyone suited to your taste?" She really couldn't wait to hear what I had to say and I hated that I had nothing good to give her.

"U-um… Well… The Prince of France seemed… The lesser of the other evils I danced with." I answered honestly, Mothers smile dropped instantly.

"I see… There was no one there you enjoyed dancing with?"

"Well I didn't mind dancing with either Grey or Phipps but that might be because I'm used to them."

"Ah! Yes! I saw your dance with Grey, you both seemed to very much enjoy yourselves!" Her excitement had returned.

"Well yes Mother I did. But it was no different from how we are every day." I stated as I began to play with the bubbles in my bath.

"But are you attracted to him?" She questioned, giving me a start.

"A-attracted?! I don't know…"

"You can't just not know." Mother desperately wanted a direct answer from me.

"I've honestly not thought about it at all."

"You've never thought of kissing him?" She questioned and I felt my face go bright.

"Certainly not! No!" I exclaimed rather loudly.

"This is quite strange, Dear. When I witnessed you two dancing I could see for a fact that you are taken with him and he with you." Mother placed a hand under her chin, "but to hear you've never even considered the idea of sharing a snog with the man. It's very peculiar."

"What do you mean you could see that I was taken with him? I don't understand how you could see something like that." I tilted my head to one side as I tried to wrap my head around the idea.

"I could tell by the way you looked at him, it's the entire reason I had him invited him as a guest. I'd seen the way you look at him before then and decided he would be a good suiter for you as well, his nobility didn't hurt much either."

"What do you mean the way I look at him? I just look at him as I would anyone else, right Irene?" I looked to the maid and she shook her head.

"I-I'm sorry Milady, but I agree with Her Majesty, and I've witnessed the way you look at him more often than she." She raised her eyes, "you two have a special relationship, albeit an unusual one, but it's easy to see the two of you are smitten."

"Well if it's as easy as you both say then why haven't I seen it?! And why hasn't he?"

"Oh he has." Mother said with a knowing grin.

"He has?!" I echoed.

"Undoubtedly." Irene chimed.

"Why's he not said anything then?" I questioned, both Mother and Irene exchanged glances.

"Your ranking for one, it wouldn't be very appropriate for him to ask your hand as a servant." Mother answered.

"And I'm sure you've thrown him off a bit as well." Irene added, "considering he's around you more often than either myself or Her Highness, I'm sure he realized at some point you weren't aware of your own feelings."

"Ugh, this is so confusing." I complained, the two women clearly didn't know what to think of my ignorance.

"No need to worry, Dear, just think on it for a while. I'm sure you'll understand how you feel soon enough."

"Why do I need to understand it when everyone else already seems to know precisely how I feel?" I grumbled in frustration, Mother only chuckled.

"Give it time." She left the room.

As Irene was helping me prepare for bed all I could think of was what they had told me only moments before hand. Was I really smitten with Grey? Surely not, I would know wouldn't I? Then again maybe not, I didn't often think on such thinks, I didn't ever actually I supposed I wouldn't have known then if I had never thought of it before. A knock came to my chamber door as I settled into bed, when Irene answered Grey sauntered into my room.

"Grey?" It was unusual to see him at that time of night, "what on earth are you doing here?" I questioned.

"Her Majesty told me I was needed in your chamber." He answered, he appeared confused at my initial surprise of his visit. Mother was trying to force me to speak with him about the dance the sneaky old woman, her trick made me growl.

"Um, yes well… I've been having trouble you see." There was a short silence.

"Trouble with what, Milady?" He questioned and I flinched how did I not think of that immediately?!

"Ah, right! The trouble is with the… w-with the window!" I said off the top of my head, Grey looked to the aforementioned frame.

"With the window, Milady?" He seemed to become more confused with such a strange reason to summon him.

"Yes well, uh, you see i-it's the top latch!" I exclaimed as I tried to think quickly, "I want to open it but I can't reach the top latch nor can Irene and it is dreadfully stuffy in here wouldn't you agree?" I looked to Irene for support, she was silent for a moment but jumped when she realized she was supposed to back me up.

"O-oh yes! That's right! Dreadfully stuffy indeed!" She exclaimed quickly as she began to fan herself with her hand, and I gave Grey a nervy smile along with an anxious laugh. He looked from me to the window then back to me.

"But, Milady, you once told me that you were terrified to sleep with the window open, for fear of someone breaking in and snatching you while you slept." His confusion was being replaced by suspicion, "I even recall you saying that you didn't care how unpleasantly warm the room became so long as the window stayed closed."

"Well, now I'm saying that I want it open." I said quickly, "I'm entitled to change my mind as I please. Now open the window!" I ordered, he gave me a wary look before hesitantly approaching the window and opening it wide. "N-no!" I cried as I really didn't wish the window to be open, Grey snapped his head toward me suddenly due to my outburst. "Uh… There's… No need for it to be so open, half way will do." Another suspicious glance before doing as instructed, then approaching my bedside.

"With all due respect, Milady, are you trying to play some sort of trick on me?" He questioned dubiously.

"Not at all… I just… Wanted the window open…" I said as I kept my eyes away from him.

"…Alright… Is there anything else you need?" He questioned, I cringed.

"No! I'm fine thanks, you can leave now." My tone was too nervy to be considered casual, and I watched as the Earl gave me one final wary look before leaving my room. Leave it to Mother to put me in such a horrible situation. "Irene."

"Yes, Mistress?"

"Close the window."

"Erm… I'm afraid I can't, Milady."

"Why not?!"

"I cannot reach the top latch!" She exclaimed, causing me to groan and flop back onto my pillows as I hoped that no one would break into my room while I slept.

"Irene, stay until I fall asleep." I ordered and I witnessed the woman smile at my command.

"Of course, Mistress."

The next day I found that Mothers patients were running thin as she wished for me to decide on a suiter to take as a husband, breakfast was a bit tense to say the least. Leaving the dining room, I was met with Grey immediately and I stopped.

"I'm glad I've run into you," I said, "something very important must be done this instant."

"What is it, Milady?"

"Go close that blasted window!" I exclaimed and the Earl laughed heartily at that, I passed him as I lead the way to my chamber. "I don't see what's so damn funny!"

"You are, Milady!" He answered as he wiped at his eyes.

"Surely I'm not that amusing to you." I said as he opened the door to my room and I entered.

"But you are. What I don't understand is: why you wanted the window open in the first place," he crossed the room.

"What I don't understand is: why you're such a meddlesome busybody!" He ignored my jab.

"You were clearly very uncomfortable with it being so, and I heard you order Irene to close it." He pulled the latch shut.

"Huh?!" I exclaimed, "you heard me?!"

"Yes, I'd only just closed the door when you gave the order after all, so I'd yet to walk on." He turned to me, "so why tell me to open it then?"

"Because!" I paused for a moment to think of a lie when no ideas came I sighed, "because Mother sent you here for no reason."

"Pardon?"

"She sent you up here with no context because you weren't needed at the time, and I couldn't just let you come up her for nothing so I lied and said I wanted the window open." I explained with an aggravated sigh.

"Her Majesty wouldn't have sent me if I wasn't needed. At the very least she believed you needed me." He said flatly.

"Well I didn't!" I growled, then I turned to the door. "You seem to overhear things an awful lot, Grey." I said, "I don't appreciate your eavesdropping."

"You're wondering what else I've heard aren't you, Milady?" His question caused me to flinch.

"Wha?! Not at all! Don't be daft!" I exclaimed as I went to leave.

"Just so you know I did overhear the conversation you had with the Queen last night." I could hear the pleasure in his tone, embarrassment filled my entire being.

"So you admit to spying then, I'll have you swim that river this time for sure, Nosey Mongrel!"

"Not spying, standing guard as I'm supposed to when you bath. One cannot help but to overhear when safeguarding someone."

"This is quite the unpleasant conversation; I don't like it." I placed my hand on the doors handle then strong arms wrapped around my shoulders. "What the devil are you doing Grey?!"

"Do you remember that time all those months ago that you said you had no interest in such things as love, or sex?" His breath tickled my earlobe causing me to shiver.

"What about it?!" I growled as I made sure to keep a stern tone.

"Maybe it's time to start taking an interest." He suggested, "last night you asked why I didn't say anything about how I feel about you, and it wasn't because of either reason Her Majesty or Irene had given, it was simply because you told me you didn't like sappy conversations, and I couldn't find a way to tell you that wouldn't be so. My apologies."

"I don't know how to take this." I responded flatly as I listened to his confession.

"That's fine, just so long as you know that I really am taken with you." I could hear the smirk in his voice.

"I honestly have no clue what to do."

"But surely you've discovered how you feel for me?" He questioned, and I nearly groaned.

"I believe I very well may have."

"Then won't you tell me?" He questioned in that patronizing way that always made me grit my teeth.

"It would appear…. That I'm…. Taken with you as well, Grey." What an embarrassing moment it was, I hated to admit how I felt before him and I hated that everyone else knew before I did! "I'm feeling foolish now." I said as I could feel the heat on my face, Grey chuckled.

"I figured as much, you seem to have a hard time admitting to things like this."

"Then why give me no other choice but to do it?!" I questioned venomously as I shook him off and spun to face him.

"Because it's cute and I like to play with you." He answered with narrowed eyes.

"Uck! I'm not a toy! I'm your Mistress!" I exclaimed, just before he pressed his lips to mine, I had been so frustrated at his words that I hadn't noticed him leaning toward me which I supposed was his plan. He pulled away from me with a devilish smirk.

"No, you're my fiancée." The statement caused me to scoff in an attempt to keep myself from smiling.

"Don't be full of yourself, I'm still a royal which means I can still make you swim London River with an eighty-pound pack strapped to your back." I opened my chamber door and strolled into the hall.

"What?! You said fifty-pounds last time!" He whined, I grinned over my shoulder at him.

"I added thirty-pounds for making me go through that embarrassment!" Grey fell in beside me.

"It was well worth the extra weight then." He shrugged and I scoffed as he looped his arm around my waste.

"Some husband you'll be, Mongrel."


	5. Chapter 5

The Bell Never Tolls

Elated doesn't even begin to describe Mothers reaction when I told her that I'd chosen Grey to be my husband, as it turned out she'd assigned him to be my guard in the hopes that the two of us would become love-struck with each other, while I would like to use a less sentimental term than love-struck, she was successful in her efforts.

Plans were made immediately for the ceremony which would be held in a grand catholic church near the center of the city, I personally didn't want a big to-do over such a thing as union, but, it was really more about what Mother wanted than what I did. She wanted to see me married before she left the world, it would be horribly cruel to deny her that wish.

Mother had become much worse then, she would groan in her sleep due to her pain, her skin was a yellow as a lemon, and the scent of her illness had begun to accompany her where ever she went, no matter how many baths she took or how much perfume was applied, the stench would never leave her.

I had heard many a rumor of the citizens not approving of my engagement to Earl Grey, mainly because I wasn't biologically related to the Queen and neither was Grey our union would create an entirely new royal family, half of which the bloodline was a bit unclear and muddled, but it wasn't as though I could help it. If Mother had any living relatives I'm sure she would've had me married to one of them so that the blood line would stay pure, however, that wasn't the case and so things turned out as such.

A wedding dress, wedding dress, wedding dress, wedding dress! For nearly two weeks then everyone had been driving mad with the talk of a blasted wedding dress! They'd brought me many to try on, none of which my Mother approved of, and I had been doing so for most of the day.

"Mother please, I wish to eat." I said tiredly as I looked to where she sat, she only shook her head.

"You can eat once we're done here." She began to look upon a dress which I had already tried on several times.

"But, Mother, you said that two hours ago, how much longer must I do this?"

"As long as it takes." Her voice had become strained due to all the coughing she'd suffered through. "Why are none of these dresses elegant enough?" She questioned curiously.

"Mother I've an idea." I said but my words hardly caught her attention, "perhaps it's because none of these dresses have been modeled on porcelain dolls." My suggestion caused her to straighten with a gasp.

"That's it!" She exclaimed, "that is precisely it! Oh my smart daughter has figured it out!" She clapped her hands happily, the truth was I had suggested it several times before she just wasn't listening then. "We must go out into the city and find one!" She exclaimed.

"But, Mother might I eat first?" I questioned, as I went to help her out of her chair.

"No, no, we've no time we must do this now!" She said as she became wobbly and Irene hurried to help her as well.

"The Doctors said you mustn't leave the palace for a few days, you cannot go anywhere I'm afraid." I said, Mother scoffed.

"Don't be ridiculous! I'll leave the palace whenever I wish."

"But you must be able to walk to do such a thing Mother!" I exclaimed.

"Well how else am I to find you a dress, my Porcelain Daughter?" She questioned tiredly.

"I shall do it myself," she gave me a nervous look, "Mother, you've been picking out porcelain doll dresses for most my life, I should know what you'd like to see me dressed in." She was quiet for a long moment.

"Actually… Pick out what you like, Dear." I blinked in surprise never had she given me the opportunity to choose my attire before! "I realize that… Well… You're a young woman and you should make your own decisions, you'll have to do so soon enough I'm afraid so you might start now." My heart nearly shattered at the mention of her impending fate.

"I shall pick something out which we'll both like." I assured her.

"Phipps will accompany you on your outing," Mother said as Irene and I helped her back into her seat.

"No, Grey will do."

"It shouldn't be your betrothed! He shouldn't see the dress before the wedding day, bad luck you know. Besides, I'm sure he would be bored by it." I laughed at that.

"Mother, it's only bad luck if he sees me in the dress before then. Also he will indeed be bored, but so will I; if I have to suffer through it then so will he."

Once Irene had assisted me into a different dress so that I could go out, I descended the stairs quickly as I very much wished to eat before doing anything else. Grey awaited me at the bottom of the staircase.

"Ah! Hello my beautiful fiancée!" He greeted, I breezed past him.

"Yes, yes, hello. I'm starving!" I exclaimed and I heard him laugh as I went on to the kitchen. The cooks and assistants all bowed upon my entering the pantry. "I need something to eat fast, a snack of some sort I don't care what."

"Might the Princess wish to have apple slices?" The cook offered seeing my hunger.

"That would be perfect, please be quick about it." I said as I took a seat at the table where the servants ate. Suddenly a kiss was placed on my cheek as Grey stood beside me.

"What's gotten in to you so suddenly?" He questioned, I supposed my behavior was a bit odd.

"What hasn't actually. Mother was so anxious for me to try on wedding dresses that she woke me herself this morning and refused to allow me to eat until we found one she liked." The chef put a plate of sliced apple before me and I was quick to begin eating.

"What? But it's well passed noon now!" Grey exclaimed, "you mean to say you haven't had lunch either?" I pointed to the plate of apple slices.

"This is lunch!"

"Surely you could eat more than that." Grey stated as the kitchen staff struggled to pass him by, I took hold of the collar of his tail coat and pulled him into the chair next to me, once he was seated he looked to me questioningly.

"You were in their way. And yes I definitely could eat more than this but I haven't the time! Mother decided I should pick a dress from a porcelain doll, she told me to leave immediately so she doesn't know I'm eating right now." I explained as I finished off the slices and stood from the table. "Thank you for your time, Chef. Please have a large dinner prepared upon my return I'm sure I'll be ravenous by then." I said as the man bowed with a smile. I then took Grey's hand and pulled him out of the kitchen. "Come we've no time to waste!"

"Wouldn't Irene be better suited for such a thing has assisting you to pick out a dress? A man should never have to pick out a woman's dress!" Grey questioned as I dragged him on.

"Yes, but I feel she's better off with Mother, if Irene's taking care of her then I know she's in good hands. Besides that, weren't you complaining just the other day that we haven't gone into the city in a while?" We both entered the stagecoach quickly and took our seats, I sighed tiredly.

"Such a weary doll." Grey said as he wrapped an arm around my shoulder and pulled me close to him, I allowed my head to rest on his shoulder. Grey was a very affectionate person, more so than myself, the best he could hope to get from me was holding hands and possibly a peck on the cheek if I was feeling particularly loving that day.

"You're uncharacteristically affectionate you know." I said quietly, he chuckled at that.

"No, Freddy, you're just abnormally unaffectionate! I believe I may be the only man to ever complain of an unaffectionate wife!" I snickered at that.

"Is it a problem?"

"If it was would you try to fix it?"

"No." He laughed softly.

"Good thing it's not then. Actually you've got such a strong personality I feel that if you were affectionate I might not be the dominant one in the relationship." I could hear the smile in his tone.

"You're only dominant because I let you be." He looked down to me.

"Is that so?"

"Mm-hmm considering I order you around all the time and such." He went quiet for a while, I uplifted my eyes to him and blinked once in confusion as to why he hadn't responded to my barb.

"You know I believe you could cause a tsunami with those lashes of yours." The sudden tangent caused me to laugh heartily then we arrived at our destination, a shop of porcelain dolls.

I looked all around the shop as there were so many things to look at, never had I actually been inside before. Upon our initial entrance the shopkeeper greeted us.

"Oh! It's the Porcelain Princess herself!" The man exclaimed excitedly, I had seen him before as I recalled him be the strangely fat man I'd seen on the street when I'd first returned to England several odd months before. "Is there anything I can help you with?" He questioned cheerily.

"Oh, well, yes actually. I would like to see the dolls which model wedding gowns please." The man seemed beside himself as he lead Grey and I on. "Are people always this excited to see me?" I whispered over my shoulder to him.

"Not usually this tickled but initially yes." He responded quietly.

Once we were shown a small section of dolls I wasn't very impressed with what the options were, they seemed to be variations of dresses I already had only in white, except for one which took me aback for a moment.

"What on earth?!" I exclaimed in shock, Grey came closer to me to see what the problem was, I simply pointed at the doll I was staring at and Grey had the same reaction as I.

"Is there something wrong Princess?" The fat shopkeeper questioned, I turned to him while still pointing at the doll.

"I-it's me!" I exclaimed, "this doll looks exactly like me!"

"Ah, yes well, once you became known worldwide as the Porcelain Princess we began to make some which resembled you, the Queen approved it so I'm surprised you didn't know." The man exclaimed merrily. I looked back to the doll.

"I had no clue." I stated as I inspected the gown of the doll, it was long and crisp white with a single light blue rose in the center of the neckline, the shoulders of the doll were exposed as long fitted lace sleeves began at the low neckline which was lined in lace as well, a thick light blue ribbon tied around its waste, the body of the dress was thick and sported a long train, the dolls veil was also lacey and held in place with a crown of light blue roses.

"Are you going to choose this one?" Grey questioned as he looked down to me, I looked to him and nodded.

"Mm-hmm, I really like it." I admitted and Grey seemed genuinely relieved.

"I'm glad, I was a bit worried you wouldn't."

"Huh?"

"I-I mean… Well…" He rubbed the back of his neck.

"Greeeeey, what did you do?" I questioned with a hint of a smirk.

"Um… Well, I figured you would come looking for a dress, so I asked the shopkeeper to make one with you specifically in mind, that's all…" He explained, a bit embarrassed.

"All? I wouldn't say that's all!" The shopkeeper chimed in, "he came in and said specifically what the dress's special features should be, the lace, the neckline cut, he's very knowledgeable about gowns!" The shopkeepers praise caused Grey to growl at him and I snickered at how pink Grey's face had become.

"What was all that talk of: 'a man shouldn't pick out a woman's dress' huh? Mongrel?" I grinned impishly to him he growled.

"Look it was only because everyone kept shouting about a dress and it was getting annoying!" His attempt to play the situation off as if he didn't care failed.

"Really? I think it's because you're hopelessly smitten with me, so much so that you'll act a fool over it." I teased with a particularly naughty smirk.

"Now don't be so conceited!" He exclaimed his face still pink with embarrassment, I intertwined our fingers and looked away from him as I spoke.

"I'm only teasing no need to get so worked up, especially in the middle of a shop!" It appeared as though I was trying to calm him but really it was subtle teasing that only people who knew me personally would pick up on, which was why Grey's eye twitched at my statement. I requested the shopkeeper prepare the doll to be delivered to the castle I would send someone for it later.

"Now, now don't pout, Mongrel." I said to Grey as I looked upon his puffed cheeks and creased brow.

"Hopelessly smitten you said, I should think not!" He exclaimed childishly, and I laughed at him. "It's not funny!"

"Yes it is!" I said through my laughter.

"You're just as smitten as I you know!" My laughter died.

"Not true!" I cried.

"Yes it is!" He shouted.

"Bah!"

"Bah to you!" We were both silent for a long moment before we burst into fits of laughter, what an odd couple we were arguing over which of us loved the other more and trying to disprove the point no less!

"I think I'll keep you around a bit longer." I said as though I were finally accepting him, which wasn't the case since I had accepted him long before.

"Well I'm happy to know." He wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me closer to him.

"Nng! Grey, if you hold me any tighter we'll be conjoined!" I exclaimed in frustration of the discomfort.

"Not true, you can't become attached just from this!" He grinned.

"Well at the very least I'd be in your lap!" I cried, and his grin widened.

"Not a bad idea actually!"

"Wai- WA!" He was quick to scoop me up and drop me onto his lap. "Really?" I asked in astonished irritation.

"Really. I think you should sit this way all the time!"

"And I think that I won't sit this way any longer!" I said as I tried to move out of his lap, he held me still. "Mongrel." It had become a sort of pet name for him, for me it was the equivalent of calling him, Sweetie.

"Oh I'm sorry I can't hear you over how smitten I am with you, you said yourself that I'd start to act a fool over it did you not?" I then began to lightly bite my lip and I watched as a shiver traveled up his spine as it always did when I would chew my lip in such a way. "Alright, alright." He allowed me to move.

"I always get you with that." I said happily.

"You always get me no matter what you do."

Mother loved the dress which Grey had had made for me, and couldn't stop staring at me when I was able to try it on. Her condition got much worse not long after that though, for nearly a week she lay in her chamber sleeping, a coma they said it was. The doctors were certain that she would never wake from it.

I never left Mother's side, I held her hand and read her favorite books to her, she would groan and scream sometimes from the pain which she still felt even in comatose, and I began to pray for death to come to her quickly. I never thought I would ever pray for my Mother to die, but I did then only to stop her suffering though.

When the day of my wedding came she passed. The wedding ceremony was replaced by a funeral which seemed more like a nightmare than reality. As I watched them lay Mother to rest in the earth I recall thinking: Come now Mother, this is your last chance to get up, this is your last chance to get out of that box before they bury you.

The wind gave me a chill as its sharp gust ran over my body, nonetheless I stayed seated neatly.

"Freddy." I looked back to find Grey approaching me, I had told him to go back to the palace and wait for me, told him I needed some time alone, he had complied with me but only because he guessed I needed space at that moment.

"I told you to wait for me at the palace." I said emptily.

"That was nearly five hours ago!" He exclaimed, "it's night-time now you need to come in or else you'll catch cold."

"No, I'm fine." I said blankly.

"You can't stay in the graveyard overnight." He said, and I looked up at him.

"Why not?"

"It's not safe! You need to come back to the palace." He knelt next to me then and placed his hands on my shoulders as I turned to face Mothers headstone.

"But I can't."

"Why?!" He was becoming overly concerned, near frantic probably because of the eerie numbness in my tone.

"I'm waiting."

"For what exactly?"

"The bell," I felt his hands flinch on my shoulder, "when it rings she should have someone around to dig her up."

"Freddy- "

"It should be ringing soon so you don't need to worry about me staying out too late." Her grave would be too far away for me to hear if she pulled the bell, the bell that rings when people who are still alive are buried, and so I had sat by her grave for hours waiting for it to chime.

"It's not going to ring, Freddy."

"You don't know that, I hear stories about it happening all the time in the middle of the night."

"Yes, I do know, please just come back to your home already."

"There was a man in America, I can't remember his name, whose wife died of a strange disease, he was extremely depressed by it and all, but, he still held out hope that he would hear that bell ring so he could get her back- "

"Freddy, listen just- "

"But he ended up falling asleep not long after nightfall and when he woke up the next morning he was terrified that he'd missed the bell ringing- "

"Freddy! Please- "

"And so he went out to dig up the grave to see if she'd actually been buried alive or not; after he dug her up and opened the coffin- "A harsh slap came to my face and Grey turned me toward him, shaking me violently.

"Snap out of it! She's gone alright! The bell isn't going to ring you hear me! It will do no good if you sit out here in the cold, get sick and die as well!" He was shouting, his eyes were nearly brimming with tears, I'd never seen him so emotional before and yet all I could say was:

"…There were scratch marks on the inside of the coffin, the wife's fingernails were all bloody and torn up. He'd fallen asleep and didn't hear the bell toll, because of that he ended up killing his love." Grey just stared at me for a long moment, his eyes wide, brows creased, he squeezed his eyes shut and put his head down.

"Why don't you listen to me? Your Mother is DEAD!" He shouted in yet another attempt to snap me out of my numbness.

"We don't know that for sure," I looked back to the tombstone, "until the bell rings." Everything went by in a blur as Grey threw me over his shoulder. "What are you doing?" I questioned in a robotic tone.

"Taking you back." He answered simply, then tossed me into the stagecoach before joining me inside.

I sat quietly staring out the window but really looking at nothing in particular, I felt soulless then felt as though I'd become a broken porcelain doll, despondent and damaged beyond repair. The woman who'd taken me out of the Poorhouse and claimed me as her own blood, treated me as though I were her actual daughter was dead, when she and I spoke bloodlines and relations didn't matter because she was undoubtedly meant to be my Mother. I wagered that's why I started out in the Poorhouse because the universe, or God, or fate, or whatever you'd like to call it, saw that I would be better off with her as my Mother.

I found myself coming closer and closer to Grey until I was sitting in his lap, with my arms wrapped around his torso, and my face buried in his chest. He was quick to embrace me tightly and we stayed like that for the entire ride back, but I'd still yet to shed a single tear over the ordeal. I wasn't trying to hold in my emotions or anything, the tears just wouldn't come.

The stagecoach stopped and Grey looped an arm under my knees and I knew that he planned to carry me inside.

"No." I said as I placed my hand on his chest and pushed lightly, "I'll walk in myself." He released me and allowed me to do as I wished.

As I entered the palace I was met with Phipps, whom was stony faced as always, and Irene, whom had clearly just recovered from sobbing. Both bowed to me and offered their condolences but I wasn't paying much attention and hadn't stop my pace; due to my zombie like actions I ended up running directly into Irene causing us both to stagger back a bit.

"I-I'm sorry, Milady!" She sobbed.

"It's fine." I went on up the stairs and to my room, where I laid down, still in the gown I'd worn to the funeral, and stared at nothing and thought of nothing for several minutes until I ended up falling to sleep.


	6. Chapter 6

Conclusion

The bell was ringing! It was ringing and I was running to save her but I couldn't, it seemed as though her grave only drifted further and further away and the bell continued its ring, ring, ringing.

I jolted upright suddenly, my asthma was acting up I couldn't breathe! No matter how much wheezing came from my lungs no oxygen came to them. I couldn't breathe! Why couldn't I breathe?! What should I have done?!

"Freddy!" The sudden voice only panicked me further, until I realized it was Grey whom sat upright quickly and began to rub my back. "Calm down, you're alright!" I began to cough uncontrollably which didn't help my breathing. "Lay back," he took me by the shoulders and gently pushed me back. The door to my chamber was suddenly thrown open, Irene came rushing in.

"Is everything alright?! I heard yelling!" She exclaimed.

"Water, get her water! She's having an attack!" Grey ordered sternly and I tried to calm my breathing, but the clamp on my lungs only seemed to tighten, the rattling in my chest increased and I felt myself trembling uncontrollably. Everything became hazy all at once and then I was looking at Charlie, she was hovering over me along with a crowd of children and then everything faded away.

Waking once again, that time without doing so in terror, I found that my vision was still a bit hazy and that my breathing was still strained but not nearly as bad as the time before. I began to sit up only to have someone guide me to lay back once again.

"Take it easy." He said, my eyes were watery which didn't help the haziness of it all.

"Mongrel…"

"You took an attack in your sleep it would seem, you woke up during the worst of it though." He said as he looked down to me, "I called a doctor, even though you didn't want me to the first time this happened. He gave you some sort of medicine and your breathings only been getting better since." He explained everything too fast, I couldn't take it all in.

"…The bell…" I saw his shoulders slump, "it rang…"

"No it didn't, Freddy."

"It rang and I couldn't get to her, no matter how fast I tried to run it just kept getting farther and farther away and I heard her say I let her down."

"H-huh? Freddy, I think you're confused." He said calmly, I shook my head.

"I'm not! That's the dream I had just before I woke up." I coughed.

"Alright, alright, no need to re-live it. Just go back to sleep." He said.

"What about you?" I questioned, between wheezes.

"Well, I stayed here last night to make sure you were okay, and I'll stay here tonight too. Now sleep." I closed my eyes without question.

I slept through that entire day and through the entire night, I didn't stir until Grey shook me awake the next morning and I glared at him furiously.

"Why're you waking me up like this?" I growled, and he breathed a sigh of relief.

"You were so peaceful throughout the night and when I woke this morning you hadn't moved from the position you laid in when I went to sleep, I feared you might've died…"

"…Well I didn't," I sat up and yawned, "so there's no need to worry about it." I was trying my best to be kind to him considering I had worried the poor man so much the day before, but it was a chore to do first thing in the morning.

A forceful kiss was suddenly placed on my lips and Grey took either of my wrists into his hands as he pushed me against the headboard roughly, his tongue harshly roaming my mouth, I did my best to return the kiss but I hadn't much energy then. After a moment or so he pulled away then he rested his head on my shoulder and nuzzled his face into my neck.

"Doctor said you nearly died," his voice cracked as he spoke, "I hadn't known how serious asthma could be or what could trigger it..." I stroked his hair lightly.

"Look I'm not dead, so don't talk about me as if I am." My voice was stern then probably a little too stern given the situation. "I'm sorry for worrying you." I added lightly, he wrapped his arms around me tightly, too tightly, and held me close for a long moment; I allowed him to do so as I usually did when he was feeling overly affectionate, and did my best to return the favor.

"You didn't eat all day yesterday," he said as he released me and moved away, keeping his head down. "You hardly ate at all in the days leading up to the Queens passing." He raised his head to look at me, "it's already obvious to anyone who sees you that you've lost weight. Come eat."

"I'm not hungry…" As I said it I could see his expression harden and I knew he was ready to scold me, "but I'll eat anyway." I added quickly. "Wait for me in the dining room, I'll join you shortly."

As Irene helped me to dress I began thinking: Mother had passed away the day before, the next day I was bed ridden, two days England had been without an official queen for two whole days, when Mother died the throne of England was automatically handed down to me, but an official christening ceremony would have to take place before any of the citizens or any of England's alley's would see me as the Monarch. It would have to be done quickly, ideally I was supposed to be married before the christening but the wedding would have to be after as the christening was more important. What else was there to think of? Ah yes, a meeting with all agents my Mother had assigned missions to. It might've seemed cruel to be thinking of business directly after Mothers death, but the country came before anything else, before health, family, love, everything else was second to that and things had to be done quickly.

Exiting my room and marching down the hall with a stern expression I called on Phipps who was standing near my door.

"Set up the arrangements for a christening immediately, the citizens must be unnerved by the fact that such a ceremony didn't take place before the Queen's passing."

"Right away." He answered quickly.

"Milady, a christening before a wedding? It goes against tradition!" Irene exclaimed as I entered the dining room.

"Tradition be damned! England needs a ruler more so than a marriage, and only the citizens who truly care for the country will understand that. The christening will happen today." I exclaimed, as I took a seat and a platter was placed before me, "the wedding will be tomorrow." I looked across the table to find Grey smirking at me. "What's that look for, Mongrel?"

"Nothing, you're just as strict as your Mother was when it comes to matters of the country. I've never seen this side of you before and honestly I find it rather provocative." He took a drink of wine.

"So you're attracted to my Mother then?" Grey choked then spit what he'd drank out before jumping to his feet and slamming his hands on the table, looking quite unnerved all the while.

"N-no!" He shook his head furiously as he seemed quite embarrassed, "what kind of question is that?! I'm only attracted to you!" He exclaimed and I laughed at his nervous outburst the smirk that crossed his lips told me he'd purposely overreacted to get me to laugh.

"I shall never be bored with you around, Mongrel." I said to him then turned to Phipps a smile still on my lips, "the christening will be in the evening in order to give all the important nobility time to prepare."

"Yes." He bowed before taking his leave.

"What is it that you'll have me do?" Grey questioned, as he took his seat.

"We've yet to marry so that means you're still my guard for the time being, of course you and Phipps will be part of the ceremony. For now, eat and then go assist with the planning along with getting the word out to guests."

"Right!"

"Taking orders well makes for a good husband." I commented and a deep frown took his place as he spoke with a fork hanging out of his mouth.

"Hey, hey now! Don't go getting overconfident!"

"Can't get what you already are." I stated as I began to eat.

Everything had to be done quickly, after the christening ceremony I would have a meeting with the agents hired by Mother to discover what they've been up to, a basic report of sorts. What a stressful day.

The ceremony went on without any problems whatsoever, though it had been many years since a christening had taken place without one of the previous Monarchs being alive. Then after I went to Mothers- I mean, my throne room, along with Grey and Phipps; awaited my meetings with each of the agents. Each one gave me a report on the current happenings of their missions and I gave them orders accordingly, I was becoming exhausted the stress was getting to me as I could hear myself beginning to wheeze.

"Milady," Grey whispered, "this should be enough for the day your breathings become strained."

"Hush now, we've only one more meeting to go, I can get through it just fine. Besides it would be rude to turn him away when he's already arrived." The grand doors opened as the next agent approached.

"Earl Ciel Phantomhive reporting." I looked to a small boy whom I recalled seeing before, he bowed on one knee and I took a couple deep breaths before speaking.

"Its… The Tattler…" I said, my wheezing wasn't that notable and with the distance between the two of us it should've gone unnoticed, however, his head snapped up to me as though he knew something was awry.

"Your Highness, are you well?" He questioned, I waved my hand at him.

"Fine, fine, just…" I took a rattling breath, "just a bit tired. Give me your report."

"Yes, well, my mission involving the serial kidnappings has been completed." He said first, "the perpetrator died and he subsequently disposed of the children which, I regret to say, I had arrived too late to save." His report caused me to narrow my eyes. That account of the events seems inaccurate, according to what I'd been informed with that is.

"Is that so?" My question caused the boy to flinch a bit as well as my two guards

"Yes, Your Majesty." He answered, another shuttering breath, the boy wasn't telling me something or completely lying I wasn't sure which.

"Very well then." I took another rattling breath, "You're dismissed now, Tattler."

Once the boy left the throne room I doubled over due to a coughing fit which I'd been struggling to hold back during his report. Grey came forward and began to rub my back.

"You need to rest for the day, Freddy, stress can trigger asthma attacks." He said calmly and I looked to him with a smirk.

"I thought you said you didn't know the triggers of asthma." I said between wheezes.

"I read up on it and I also spoke with the Doctor while he was here, you need to take another day of rest."

"I'll rest once the wedding ceremony is done."

"No we'll put it off a day, your health is more important than that." I gave him a strong glare.

"Grey! This wedding isn't for either of us! It's for the good of the country damn it! I know how I feel about you and how you feel for me that's enough for me personally, but not for the citizens whom insist the Queen be married, it must be tomorrow to put the populace at ease. There will be no arguments!" I growled, Grey clearly wanted to argue.

"I!" he stopped short and his expression softened, "… I understand and I know your right… Very well, but you'll stay in bed for the rest of the day and until the wedding tomorrow." He demanded.

"Fine, I'll give you this compromise." I said as I stood from my throne, then Grey swept me off my feet immediately so that he was cradling me in his arms. "What's all this then?" I questioned with a wheezy laugh, Grey grinned to me.

"You said you'd rest for the remainder of the day; I should surely take you to your room." He exclaimed and went on.

Lying in bed already feeling completely useless I looked to Grey to do my work for me and ordered him about furiously, whatever he'd had in mind for me earlier was definitely not going to happen, not with my orders at least.

Later Grey joined me in my lounging, which I wasn't too fond of, he looped an arm around my shoulder and pulled me close that time I fully embraced the action.

"Somethings bothering me." Grey said and I could feel him looking down at me.

"What is it, Mongrel?" I questioned while keeping my eyes closed.

"I've… Not seen you cry yet…" His answer made my shoulders tense.

"It's none of your business," I said honestly, "whether I cry or not is only my business and nobody elses."

"Hmph, the Queen thought the same way and because of that there was never a moment when her eyes didn't appear sad."

"Stop pretending to be wise," I ordered, "it sounds silly." He chuckled at that.

"Stop being foolish and I won't have to play like I'm wise."

"I'm in no mood to talk about this." I said lowly.

"Good, maybe that means you'll listen for once." I only huffed in response, "I think it's why you've taken so many attacks lately." I cringed at that, "the emotional stress, it's causing you to take fits you need to release the stress of it all- "

"I can't."

"You can."

"You don't understand, I can't!" I exclaimed, "it's not because I don't want to or because I'm holding back my emotions… There just aren't any tears right now. Please, Mongrel, leave the matter be for now. Tomorrow we'll marry and that will relieve most of my stress I promise."

"Very well, Your Highness." His amused tone made me laugh and cover my eyes.

"Uugh, don't do that!" I giggled. What a man I had next to me.

I woke in the middle of yet another horrible fit, the Doctor had said that if I wasn't watched more closely asthma might be the death of me, Grey offered him a temporary position as a live-in physician for me which the Doctor gladly accepted.

Grey once again tried to persuade me to push the wedding back a day, I told him the invitations had already been remade once and that we shouldn't appear so fickle to the nobility, the wedding would be that evening.

I made sure that it was a fast ceremony, neither Grey nor I really cared much for weddings anyhow, so that we could get it out of the way. Walking down the aisle in the dress Grey had chosen I listened to all the whisperings of nobility as I passed, some of the comments uncivilized others gracious. The vows were said as well as both the 'I do's' a kiss was shared and then we were married, Grey was no longer my butler or my guard he was King then, but that didn't mean I couldn't order him around.

Later that night I sat soaking in the ever sweet smelling water of my bath, Irene standing in her usual place waiting to be called upon. I thought back to that conversation I'd had with Mother, just after the ball of suiters. She'd so desperately wanted me to be wed and I was willing to make any decision to please her, to find that she had indeed planned for Grey and I to be together… Was a comfort somehow. But… Mother had spoken for so long of attending my wedding of actually watching the ceremony, she had been excited for so long and yet she never even got to see the event, she had approved of my dress and had seen me model it for her which seemed to make her content, but, I couldn't help but to wonder if it were enough for her. If only the wedding were placed just a week or so earlier, I would've known that she died completely content with everything.

"Your Majesty?" Irene's voice caused me to look to her, she then stood just beside the bath tub. She touched her fingers to my face, "has it finally sunk in then?" She questioned and I realized that I was crying.

"Ah, this?" I said as I looked away from her and wiped at my eyes with my wrists, "no this isn't… I'm just… I…" I felt my breathing become heavy, but not due to asthma, then I let out a loud wail and buried my face in my hands. Irene knelt down next to me clearly wanting to embrace me but not wanting to over step her boundaries, the doors to the bath flew open and of course Grey came rushing in dismissing Irene quickly while wrapping his arms around my still wet body.

The constant pressure that I'd felt on my lungs ever since Mother went comatose finally lifted along with most of my anxieties, and my breathing became normal for the first time in nearly two weeks. To have finally cried was truly a blessing.

Grey and I we were happy in our relationship, we never stopped our tomfoolery and I regret to say that our hopelessness had rubbed off on our two sons, but oh well, maybe they would be able to find someone whom was cut from the same cloth as they. To England we were known as the Porcelain Family, yes my nickname had come after even my sons, and with Grey at my side we were able to make England as prosperous as when Mother had ruled, and I began to feel as though I really hadn't let her down.

Our boy's came bounding into the throne room chasing one another when Nikolai, the youngest of the two, fell suddenly and began to cry I stood ready to calm the child's tears when his brother, Thomas, came to his side.

"Come on now Nick, you shouldn't cry over a little scrape!" He exclaimed, the younger of the two looked to Thomas with teary eyes.

"B-but it hurts!" He sniffled helplessly.

"It doesn't matter; don't you know the crown isn't meant for mild men? Just because we're called the Porcelain Family doesn't mean we're actually so fragile, get up now and let's go!" Nikolai only sniffled before standing and quickly running on after his brother.

"Thomas has your attitude," Grey stated and I scoffed.

"Hardly! I've never acted in such a way in all my life!" I exclaimed as I took my seat once again, Grey grinned sneakily.

"You've forgotten the first day we met already?!" He questioned, "the day when you spoke the very same way of 'mild men'?!"

"I can't recall," I lied, "It was ten years ago after all!" I was lifted out of my throne and Grey placed me onto his lap.

"What I don't understand is: why you bother to tell such an obvious lie." He said as we smiled to one another.

"What I don't understand is: why you're such a meddlesome busybody." He ignored me.

"You're clearly very aware that he has your attitude and yet you continue to deny it." He grinned in that patronizing way of his and I scrunched my nose at him.

"And you clearly don't know when to shut your trap," he chuckled at that. "What say you Mongrel? Shall I have you run the perimeter of the palace or swim London River with an eighty-pound pack strapped to your back?" He pulled my face closer to his.

"So long as Milady doesn't send me off to the sun I don't mind." He answered smoothly, and he pulled me in to a kiss which hadn't yet lost the passion of new lovers, once we separated I spoke in an unusually loving tone.

"Sarcastic Mongrel."


End file.
